My real world familiar Fear and Parenting in Las Vegas has made me her bitch beloved by pimping my blog and giving me one of those deserved coveted awards for being a wicked stepmonster and psycho hose beast to the stankalicious Monkey Boy on my most visited post ever: Jesus Tapdancing Christ, What’s That Smell? It was a fucking fabulous post, but it is not my best. (This one is in my humble opinion.) Anyway, I am absofuckinglutely worthy of this little bling as I am deeply superficial and will showcase it proudly and properly on a special page with my other awards (after I revamp by blogroll and get a custom template). I just wish I had more awards to show off. Hint hint!
Anyway, I am expecting company now because there is much link love over at Petroville and Suburban Turmoil — two ass-kicking sites I did not know existed until today.
Won’t they all be filled with shock and awe when they realize I am so NOT a mommy blogger? For the record, there is nothing inherently wrong with being a self-proclaimed mommy blogger, but I cannot let one aspect of my life define me or my blog. I am a life blogger. I Read Banned Books is the story of my life – a living diary, of sorts. If it happens, I blog it, and I make it as entertaining as fucking possible. And, yes, I have fucking issues, but the voices tell me what to do. I like them because they do not argue back or try to copy me. I know voodoo, speak snark as a second language, and say FUCK a fucking lot. If you are a dumbass or an asshat, I will be calling you on it. If you are a troll, I will be sending you back to your bridge because you have no powers here. What can I say? I’m just different.
In a nutshell: I am not fucking sorry. I can be perfect.
Thank you, fandpinlv. You make me want to feel humble, but I know I am worthy. Snicker.
LMFAO. “You make me want to feel humble, but I know I am worthy.” I’m so glad I have your blog to entertain me. It deserves a thousand fucking awards in my opinion, plus a lot of link love and high traffic stats;)
Your blog is pure gold and worthy of EVERY award! You are a fucking genius!
You make me laugh. That is all.
It is definitely entertaining as fucking possible over here. You rock!
LMFAO! Your blog is one of my favorite parts of the morning! i scroll through my reader every morning so I can read it before anything else.
Congratulations, your Highness!
Congratulations!
you’re welcome.
A well deserved acknowledgment of a given fact. yay!
@ Miss Attitude ~ My plan is to terrorize the internet one wannabe at a time.
@ Topsurf ~ Who said all the geniuses were at the Apple Store?
@ DigitalRob ~ I make myself laugh too. Is that conceited? Because if it is, fuck it!
@ Rachael ~ Well, I fucking hope so because it is exhausting being this fucking fabulous all of the time.
@ Perpstu ~ Now that’s the kind of ass-kissing I love.
@ Yoonamaniac ~ I’d much rather here congratulations when I am promoted.
@ Fandpinlv ~ Think nothing of it.
@ Claudia ~ You will always hold a special place in my heart because you recognized my excellence first a long time ago.