I Read Banned Books

10-month administrators (deans, the school disciplinarians) returned to work today. I was among hundreds of them. The region I work in reassigned me to a new school for this year. I am told that was to give me more diverse experience in order to better prepare me for a move to the next level which [...]

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Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince … $15.78
Madden NFL 2006 for XBox … $49.92
Kodak 5 MP EasyShare DX7590 Digital Camera … $349.54
Watching a 2 1/2 year-old take off his urine-soaked diaper without removing his pants in the cat litter aisle at the local Wal-mart as he parents stand helpless and mortified … PRICELESS!
No, I don’t [...]

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You might be a redneck if you watch this more than once like I did. Enjoy!

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A college class was told they had to write a short story in as few words as possible. The instructions were the short story had to contain the following three things:
(1) Religion(2) Sexuality(3) Mystery
There was only one A+ paper in the entire class. Below is the A+ short story:…………
“Good God, I’m pregnant, [...]

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Awoke to Spenser yipping and sighing at 3 frigging 30 AM only to discover a half hour later that he did not need to pee or poop but wanted to play (And I think I want a baby?)
Returned to a deep sleep, had a nightmare, made sure Booger Bear was home and alive, and snoozed [...]

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1. I was winner of my hometown’s beauty pageant in 1988.2. I ran myself over with my own car and survived.3. My first date was with a boy named Michael Myers.
This was inspired by an icebreaker I have done with former students and at multiple inservices. Those [...]

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Obscenities Uttered by Jesus Christ:
“Dad damn you.”
“Holy Mom, mother of me.”
“Dad.”
“Myself almighty.”
“Good me.”
“Me, Mom, and Mom’s husband …”
“Me.”
I wish I could say I thought of these all by myself. These are courtesy of McSweeney’s — great site to bookmark and read regularly.

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